..::THE BREAK UP::..

 PART 1

    Question??do u ever feel like dying??*choi choi*..or cry out like crazy or like mad pig..i feel this way and is worst than i through..i never feel tired when i cry..this feeling is really bad..*children..do not try this at home or anywhere else*...lol..if u dunno me..sure feel..this crazy gal..break up di still can joke like this..but acutually i really dunno how to express my feelings at this moment..besides crying??i will feel..even i cry so bad..but still nobody can help me..beside him??too be honest..i will never ever feel this bad before..i cry until i cant stop..until i cant even control myself..he seem like part of my life..image..part of ur life just leave u..how pain tht will be..pain until u feel like dying..this is the feeling when u re alone..when u will be alone??when u break up...and i feel this so badly now...

     For other people..they will just think..just a normal couple..no big deal..why cry so hard for it..but do u really hang out with a people like every single day..single moment or even minute..after school..we just went home together..after that i will just go over his house hang out with him..he play com..maybe i sleep on his bed or maybe i will cook for him..or just sit there and see??after some time..he see i so sien..he will come over and play with me..ask me bout my day..teach me how 2 play his game..which is i dont really like it..but i still bother to listen..althrough is just 1 year++..but in this long year..we make alot of memories for both of us..all the places..have alot of our sounds..pictures...

   Have you ever feel like watching ur own pass time..in each of every single place u walk pass??is just like those movie always show the black n white flim..and u actually see wad u and him have done last time..in this place..wad re we actually doing here..how our face look like that time..when i see the picture pops out in my mind..i just cant help start to cry..and cry..but nobody will care beside drea..if she knows..how does it feel??i can tell you that feelings will be great but yet..that will be so painful...so hurt..

   Everytime i tell everyone i will be fine..but actually im not..im so sad..until i cant help crying again..when the person u care the most suddenly just went out of ur life..the feeling just like u need 2 start a new life again...now..after school..all i can do is stay in house..rott like mad..i must really do something to make myself crazy..stop thinking off him..but when i have just a second of break..i will just cry like mad..why must i treat myself like tht??like he will even know..see..or care..i believe even he see but he cant do anything..cuz is a deal..we make a tough deal..even i cant really take it..i cry for the hold nite..when we make that deal..14/08/06 00.00......this is the day than we actually finish everything..every single thing..there will me the last moment..for both of us..

    When 23.56..he sent me a msg..he only say.."overall..u re a nice gal..but u just fall to a wrong guy!!"..i was crying like mad people on my bed..i use 1 hold nite to think..how we know each other..how we argue..than i bring out every single thing he gave me..i only reliaze..he gave me so many things..when i look at all the things he gave..soft toy..picture we taken..movie ticket...i look at every since thing..i will think back..where is this thing come from..how it become my stuff..actually everything he gave me..tht is a story behide..i was hugging all the stuff belongs to him..and cry for the hold nite..pictures..every single time we ponteng school..we will go mall and have fun..and of cause take picture..having so much fun..being crazy to each other..i just miss him so much..until i cant even stand the pain and cry...why..why all this will happen on me....why me

    to be continue tomorrow....

                                             ^*^SUCH A GREAT WEEK^*^

    Haha..last 2 days i was just lazy to wrote blog..so i think i should Tell how i feel last two to three days ago..last few days and of cause plus 2day..i feel my life is better day by day..i mean im quit lucky i guess..ngek ngek..why i say tht..even i also dunno..but i just feel i was very happy..last few days..and of cause 2day too..

    Lol..you guys will wonder when am i gonna start my lovely story..well..im gonna tell u now..1st..i was quite upset before that..cuz of me boy(haih~~)..he ditch me that nite..n dunno why..i just cant sleep..so i on9..than i meet a guy through the net..i know is very stupid to ask a guy out if you just know him for not even 1 day..but guess wad..i just did..cuase my feeling told me that..he is not like other terrible or bad greek..i just know that..and of cause i trust myself~~hehe..(my feeling very chun)if people not like me..plz do not try man..

   So..after this really funny chat..i started to notice this boy name weng foo(bubu)by the game..at 1st i through he was a gal..cuz the fren who play together...called him..*bubu*..how can u think of a guy name that..i mean..is a very cute name..but not really on a guy rite..haha..than we re in the same team..so we know each other more through the team chat..than he added me in msn n friendster..so we know each othe more..after that we have kinda crazy chat until almost 6 in the morning only go to bed..

   The next day..i just cant stop thinking of this boy..so i just wanna cheak on him wonder wad kinda boy is he??when i saw his friendster's pic..his is not really handsome..but cute..just like a small boy..read his's testi only know he is a "ladies man"..so it makes me even happy that i know he is tht type of boy..cuz tht type of boy will even caring..kind n sweet to gals..so actually i just feel happy..cuz most of his testi have good comment..so it makes me feel he even better than i think..??i guess so..but i really very happy bout it..cuz hardly will meet this kinda guy..actually i have one around me..tht edward..but he like someone else...*sobie*

   So finally the concert start..than i also start my lovely job=seeking hotties la..of cause..than i saw one very cute..not very..is super super hot n handsome guy..OMG..when he talked to me..i really can feel the feelings of melt..do you ever feel that before..his smile can really touch ur heart..but diff feelings la..im not so siao..but just cant help..i just cant keep my eyes off him..finally i know from my bestie..he is the totally hotie in they church...OMG..i cant cant  forget wad he say to me..his smile..his voice..it really melts ur heart man!!!just wishing very badly that he is my boyfriend..but..i can only say..DREAM ON PINKY!!!!!

   And finally..today..me n my boy..we went 1U watch movie..guess who i saw..my fav guy in TV..ANDREW..ArRR..i really happy like crap when i saw him..n he was walking with his fren..OMG...i swear that was my best moment in life..he smile to me..and i really cant believe i will actually saw him in mall..i se to see in newspaper..TV..but not in real life..in Tv..he looks handsome..cuase maybe he make-up??but in real life..he doesnt look any diff..but he look so cute with a beg??haha..a beg..ok is not funny..on stage..he is just like super star..with a wonderful voice..but the one i saw 2day..not 2 say diff..or ugly..just look innocent..and so cute..i begg my boy..2 follow him..so i can see him again..but..wad 2 do...our movie is going 2 start..so i was so upset when i look at his back..i will never forget this day..it was a wonderful day for me..i told my babe.."i was so so HAPPY..not because i finally get to hang out with you..but i saw my FAV guy in TV!!woo~~"haha...and him..just can show that stupid face and ask me dont be crazy!!hahah~~

   So..this is my blog 2nite..hope you all enjoy..cause i really enjoy alot..esp my day...i really enjoy it so so much!!=)so nite nite foks...

                                                                                          xoxo,

                                                                                             P I N K Y

                                                            *~*jiu shi ai ni*~*

      AI NI??is that a magic word??WO AI NI..I LOVE YOU..is that a really magic word..if u wanna know..i will tell u..this magic word will only work on girls..not all..but most of all..girls..they like guys to be romantic..sweet..caring..of cause..must really love her always..that the mean point right...me..myself..i fall 2 a guy who doesn't love me at all...erm..not to say dont love me..just not as much as something else..i mean for him..something is after family but not me..maybe we havent reach until that stage gua..i guess..but should i really give up and get other guy??maybe i should right..haih..but i still havent get the right guy so far..but beside him..now..this moment..not 2 say i dont love him..just not as much as last time..so in other view or other feeling..i still seeking my mr.right..i mean..yea i not really beautiful..not really cute..not really a dream girl like everybody will like..im just a normal girl who wanted a un-normal life..im hoping for wonderful boy and wonderful guy..everybody will think..i also not leng lui..i should feel glad to have "him"..but i wanted to tell everybody so badly..that im not happy at all..really not happy at all..maybe im not the most pityful..the most suffer girl..but i dunwan anything good..i didnt want a hot guy..i only want a guy who love me always sweet talk me..and never leave me because of small thing..never..this is not wad i want..maybe like wad everybody say..is not hard to look for your mr.right..esp our age..opps..forget to tell..im only 16..yup..16..not very young but yet not very old..i mean age is not a problem right??i meet few case that from young they know until they married..i wanna tell..there is really such thing but not much only..

    i have give him so many chances..and this is wad i get??waiting for nothing besides my tears??is this wad i get??i see everybody got they own problem..but..they can go over it..but why not me??i keep telling myself..i should give him other chance and of cause give myslef a change too..but wad i get after a chance??tears..broken heart..or waiting for him to ask for other chance??i keep fooling myself..i can wait..is just a stage..i can go through it..just abit hard..i can pass this thing..but the fact is..i will keep stuck there..never move again..haha..i laugh for myself..i mean im not pretty but i not stupid right??why i waste so much time on him..this is not a race for me..im just wasting my time..but think other side is not worth at all that i give up..do you even feel stupid to lose to "his" friends "his" com??you know..actually i feel very stupid when i do that..i actually just did that..i mean how stupid i can be to lose to a com..no why i compair at the 1st place..but the fact is..i will never win..i maybe win everything in my life..but not his heart..never will be his feelings..he maybe will feel sad..but his way to settle it..is to dump me..make me feel better..but that doesn't work on me..

      now i dont even know wad am i doing??waiting for wad??i just want a place to let me stay..i dont even feel that i love him anymore..with him??maybe he is just a place for me to stay..when i get a better place..i shell leave this place..this place gives me alot of cut..deep cut in my heart..until it wil never recover..cause when almost recover..other cut will be coming..he is going to leave me no long..last time maybe i will worry..when he go NS meet other girl..or when he go college..wad should i do??but now..i feel..the day he leave school maybe is the day the game should over..no point if im the only one who play the game..now if argue..i dont dare to say break up..cause i know it will happen..but if he say it..i will do everything to save this relationship..everything..cause once i break up..means i have no place to stay..is a pain when a guy bother to beg you just to ask for break up..can u actually feel that??i do..i really do..i bet you will never wanna know how it feels..is even pain when you fall down..

       last time..i will always laugh at people who die because of love..who willing to kill themself..because of love..but if you actually in love..i think you will even do everything because of love..is everything..even die..this is why when people always say WO YUAN YI..juile willing to learn piano because her boyfriend like..carol will willing to give up her friends or even her everything because of her boy..ayu willing to smoke for her boy ask her to..people will willing to do everything because of the one they love..just because a guy say "I WANT YOU"..because of i want you to do this or do that..now i think..im the one who really bad to laugh at people..laugh at people..when they do something so touching..althrough i still dont argee..but i will never laugh..last time when i have problem i use to cry to my friend...but wads the point i cry to them..no point..waste my time and my tears..cause they cant help..all they can do is ask me dont so sad..dont cry..haih..but the fact is im sad..so now i dont really tell when i have problem..just hope they dont worry so much..anyway..i know when i have problem i should tell you..but my friend..you also have problem too..so no point i "fan" you rite..but i know you will always there for me..cause i know that la..

      they always say "he dont care bout me..she dont care bout me"..but did you all think..when they really care..do you bother..if you do..you wont even complain at the 1st place..am i right??for him..from i ask alot until i dont even dare to ask a single thing..until today..i still will drop tears because he dont care bout me..but i know myself well..o longer or later..if we re still together..for me...he will only be my place to stay..when i get a better place..1st thing i do..i will leave this place..people will ask..why you still stay there..if so suffer..but..if i dont stay here..where can i go??there is no place ou there i can stay..no more place for me to stay so far..

      so this is wad i wanna say tonight..sorry for nothing much to share...that is all wad i wanna share tonight..so hope 2ml will be better..hope you all enjoy..and good nite!!=)

                                                                                                                 XOXO,

                                                                                                                     P I N K Y

+-+THAT'S WHEN I LOVE YOU+-+

When you have to look away
when you don't have much to say
that's when i love you
i love you
just that way...

~=~GOD MUST HAVE SPENT LITTLE MORE TIME ON YOU~=~

                                                                    
ARTIST :N,SNYC

ALBUM   :N,SNYC

TITLE    :GOD MUST HAVE SPENT LITTLE MORE TIME ON YOU

Can this be true?

Tell me can this be real?

How can I put into words what I feel?

My life was complete

I thought I was whole

Why do I feel like I'm losing control?

Never thought that love could feel like this

And you changed my world with just one kiss

How can it be that right here with me

There's an angel

It's a miracle

CHORUS

Your love is like a river,

Peaceful and deep

Your soul is like a secret that I never could keep

When I look into your eyes

I know that it's true,

God must have spent a little more time on you

In all of creations all things great and small

You are the one that surpasses them all

More precious than any diamond or pearl

They broke the mold when you came in this world

And I'm trying hard to figure out

Just how I ever did without

The warmth of your smile

The heart of a child

That's deep inside

Makes me purified

CHORUS

Your love is like a river,

Peaceful and deep

Your soul is like a secret that I never could keep

When I look into your eyes

I know that its true,

God must have spent a little more time on you

Never thought that love could feel like this

And you changed my world with just one kiss

How can it be that right here with me?

There's an angel

It's a miracle

CHORUS

Your love is like a river,

Peaceful and deep

Your soul is like a secret that I never could keep

When I look into your eyes

I know that its true,

God must have spent a little more time on you

God must have spent a little more time...

On you